It’s been more than 6 months since our son Sora was born and I have been putting off writing our birth story for so long now. Ours is a long story which won’t be complete without narrating the journey up to the birth.
The story almost sounds made up as so many pieces have come together perfectly. I found wonderful friends in fellow new mother, Valentina and our midwife, Suyai. Skeptics in our family have been converted into believers of a natural home birth. The story is so long that I definitely
must be leaving some parts out.

First Trimester –

My husband and I were thrilled to find out about our pregnancy. But soon the thrill changed to anxiety as we started planning our birth. I had seen a documentary film called “What babies want”. My sister had shown it to me years ago. After watching it I had decided that I would have immediate
skin to skin with my baby when I had one. The thought had stuck with me ever since. That was initially the only thing I knew about a natural undisturbed birth and also the only thing I had asked for in my birth. We knew this wasn’t a possibility in a hospital environment so we started planning for a home birth. We approached a nurse midwife who was also a family friend. We went to ask her about the possibility of having immediate skin to skin right after birth. Unfortunately she wasn’t interested enough to understand the concept and didn’t seem to support or encourage our “strange” approach to birth. After about an hour of talking to her we learned that the protocol followed for a vaginal birth in the medicalised system here included things like epidural,episiotomy, artificial induction, cutting the cord of the baby immediately after birth and separation of mother and baby right at the moment of birth. I hadn’t done my research then so I had just sat silently and listened to her. We were in our sixth week of pregnancy when our search for a water birth in India landed us on Birth India’s website. So we finally decided to settle for the second best option and booked ourselves a slot for December at a birthing centre in Cochin called Birth Village. There too, I was required at least one ultrasound to know the position of the placenta to rule out a placenta previa. This was more to avoid doctors
bullying for apparent negligence (if at all we ended up needing an emergency hospital transfer) than for the birth centre’s protocol. I had settled for that one ultrasound which I had planned to take as late as possible. But the thought of traveling with a newborn had started to give me nightmares in my sleep. Nonetheless, we had a plan now.

Second Trimester –

Stars were with me and I connected with Valentina on Facebook, she was a doctor herself and also happened to be pregnant. She was very open to new ideas like me and soaked in all the information that I had shared
like a dry sponge. In the initialdays of our friendship, we would chat all night sharing information and links about the research for a natural birth. Now we were a team. It was nice because our due dates were just a week apart too with Valentina’s being ahead of mine. I also talked to Priyanka from Birth Village and she was being of immense help to me. She told me that it was not only okay but beneficial to exercise during pregnancy. By that time I had decided to also explore the idea of a home birth (an alternative to travelling to BirthVillage) with Valentina’s mother, who was a midwife and finally asked her. We met over coffee and she seemed thrilled about it except she wanted to pull in another nurse midwife friend for the birth since our due dates were so close to each other. That’s when we were introduced to Suyai Steinhauer, our lovely midwife, who became one of our dearest friends. She was coming to India for the Human Rights in Childbirth conference. She agreed to be our midwife. Now our plan was in place and the crazy nightmares about disastrous births that had been haunting me every night faded away! I slept peacefully from now on.

Third Trimester –

I liked Suyai for the many things that I found in common with her. Most importantly we believed in and practised a similar diet. Wholesome natural food with lots of probiotics prepared with time-tested traditional methods. She brought along her sourdough and kefir cultures all the way from US and yes we got a scoop of it! she also encouraged us to be active during our pregnancy. So we went for walks, mopped the floor on all fours and even tried cycling. With the help of Suyai, we learned to monitor my blood pressure and sugar levels periodically at home. It was going smoothly. I had to have a back up plan for a possible emergency at birth due to unforeseen complications. So I asked my father to talk to his friend.No hospital takes delivery cases here unless you show documents
for at least three antenatal appointments, which we obviously don’t have as I wasn’t visiting doctors and had decided on only one ultrasounds. I was depending on natural methods, my gut and fetal monitors to keep track of my baby.I only hoped that everything worked out well and I have a successful home birth. But then I started having Hicks contractions in the middle of my
trimester.

The Birth –

— Kundo Yumnam —